As part of doing Personal Progress for church, I re-read the book Essentialism for the Choice & Accountability project. I just wrote this reflection on the book.
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For this project, I re-read the book "Essentialism" by Greg McKeown. This book is incredibly relevant for the choice and accountability theme as it focuses on us making conscious decisions in our lives regarding where we're going to devote our times and energies and where we're won't. Too often, we buy into the false notion that we can do it all or that we don't need to make trade-offs in our lives. McKeown instead advocates for the notion that we can do anything but not everything in life and that we should do "less but better". "The way of the Essentialist means living by design, not by default. Instead of making choices reactively, the Essentialist deliberately distinguishes the vital few from the trivial many, eliminates the nonessentials , and then removes obstacles so the essential things have clear, smooth passage. In other words, Essentialism is a disciplined, systematic approach for determining where our highest point of contribution lies, then making execution of those things almost effortless."
McKeown reminds "if you don't prioritize your life, someone else will." This is "not just getting rid of the obvious time wasters, but cutting out some really good opportunities as well." It's the "tough trade-off between lots of good things and a few really great things." McKeown points to people's highest point of contribution being at the intersection of three key questions
1 What do I feel deeply inspired by?
2 What am I particularly talented at?
3 What meets a significant need in the world?
In a gospel context, we know that agency led to a war in heaven and that it's important for us to act instead of being acted upon. In his book, McKeown points to our "invincible power of choosing to choose" as he says "for too long, we have overemphasized the external aspects of choices our options and underemphasized our internal ability to choose our actions. This is more than semantics. Think about it this way. Options things can be taken away, while our core ability to choose free will cannot be ... The ability to choose cannot be taken away or even given away - it can only be forgotten."
McKeown speaks of the importance to distinguish the "trivial many" from the "vital few" and points out that "the overwhelming reality is we live in world where almost everything is worthless and a very few things are exceptionally valuable."
Speaking of trade-offs, he says "we can try to avoid the reality of trade-offs but we can't escape them ... the reality is, saying yes to any opportunity by definition requires saying no to several others ... it is easy to see why it's so tempting to deny the reality of trade-offs. After all, by definition, a trade-off involves two things we want ... a Nonessentialist approaches every trade-off by asking, 'How can I do both?' Essentialists ask the tougher but ultimately more liberating question, 'Which problem do I want?' ... Instead of asking, 'What do I have to give up?' they ask, 'What do I want to go big on?'"
As part of making decision / trade-offs, he suggests making space to really think and reflect, being clear on the question at hand that you're trying to answer, using play to spark exploration, get enough sleep, and using extreme criteria "If it isn't a clear yes, then it's a clear no".
Essential intent is essential (pun intended). "An essential intent is both inspirational and concrete, both meaningful and measurable. Done right, an essential intent is one decision that settles one thousand later decisions. It's like deciding your going to become a doctor instead of a lawyer. One strategic choice eliminates a universe of other options and maps a course for the next five, ten, or even twenty years of your life. Once the big decision is made, all subsequent decisions come into better focus."
Saying no ins't always easy and emotion can get in the way. Emotions and social pressure "distract us from the reality of the fact that either we can say no and regret it for a few minutes, or we can say yes and regret it for delays, weeks, months, or even years. The only way out of this trap is to learn to say no firmly, resolutely, and yet gracefully. Because once we do, we find, not only that our fears of disappointing or angering others were exaggerated, but that people actually respect us *more*. Since becoming an Essentialist, I have found it almost universally true that people respect and admire those with the courage and conviction to say no ... we need to learn the slow 'yes' and the quick 'no'."
McKeown points out that if you don't set boundaries, there won't be any. "When people make their problem our problem, we aren't helping them we're enabling. Once we take their problem from them, all we're doing is taking away their ability to solve it."
To succeed, we can plan well, remove obstacles, have small win, create routines, focus on the hardest thing first, and focus on what's important now.
McKeown reminds "if you don't prioritize your life, someone else will." This is "not just getting rid of the obvious time wasters, but cutting out some really good opportunities as well." It's the "tough trade-off between lots of good things and a few really great things." McKeown points to people's highest point of contribution being at the intersection of three key questions
1 What do I feel deeply inspired by?
2 What am I particularly talented at?
3 What meets a significant need in the world?
In a gospel context, we know that agency led to a war in heaven and that it's important for us to act instead of being acted upon. In his book, McKeown points to our "invincible power of choosing to choose" as he says "for too long, we have overemphasized the external aspects of choices our options and underemphasized our internal ability to choose our actions. This is more than semantics. Think about it this way. Options things can be taken away, while our core ability to choose free will cannot be ... The ability to choose cannot be taken away or even given away - it can only be forgotten."
McKeown speaks of the importance to distinguish the "trivial many" from the "vital few" and points out that "the overwhelming reality is we live in world where almost everything is worthless and a very few things are exceptionally valuable."
Speaking of trade-offs, he says "we can try to avoid the reality of trade-offs but we can't escape them ... the reality is, saying yes to any opportunity by definition requires saying no to several others ... it is easy to see why it's so tempting to deny the reality of trade-offs. After all, by definition, a trade-off involves two things we want ... a Nonessentialist approaches every trade-off by asking, 'How can I do both?' Essentialists ask the tougher but ultimately more liberating question, 'Which problem do I want?' ... Instead of asking, 'What do I have to give up?' they ask, 'What do I want to go big on?'"
As part of making decision / trade-offs, he suggests making space to really think and reflect, being clear on the question at hand that you're trying to answer, using play to spark exploration, get enough sleep, and using extreme criteria "If it isn't a clear yes, then it's a clear no".
Essential intent is essential (pun intended). "An essential intent is both inspirational and concrete, both meaningful and measurable. Done right, an essential intent is one decision that settles one thousand later decisions. It's like deciding your going to become a doctor instead of a lawyer. One strategic choice eliminates a universe of other options and maps a course for the next five, ten, or even twenty years of your life. Once the big decision is made, all subsequent decisions come into better focus."
Saying no ins't always easy and emotion can get in the way. Emotions and social pressure "distract us from the reality of the fact that either we can say no and regret it for a few minutes, or we can say yes and regret it for delays, weeks, months, or even years. The only way out of this trap is to learn to say no firmly, resolutely, and yet gracefully. Because once we do, we find, not only that our fears of disappointing or angering others were exaggerated, but that people actually respect us *more*. Since becoming an Essentialist, I have found it almost universally true that people respect and admire those with the courage and conviction to say no ... we need to learn the slow 'yes' and the quick 'no'."
McKeown points out that if you don't set boundaries, there won't be any. "When people make their problem our problem, we aren't helping them we're enabling. Once we take their problem from them, all we're doing is taking away their ability to solve it."
To succeed, we can plan well, remove obstacles, have small win, create routines, focus on the hardest thing first, and focus on what's important now.
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