Family meetings

Every Sunday morning, we have a family meeting. It's a tradition that my wife started a couple of months ago and so far it's been a big success. I'd certainly advocate the tradition for any family - whether they have kids or not. The meetings are a built-in time to check in, connect as a family, and discuss pertinent ideas or issues. For our meetings, the stated purposes are:

• To give compliments
• To help each other
• To solve problems
• To plan family activities

The kids (particularly JD) really seem excited and empowered by the meetings. Some of the topics JD has asked to discuss are how we can show people we love them, what we can do if someone is not being nice, and how we can keep loving each other even if we have an argument. For each topic, we brainstormed a set of possible solutions and then posted a sign on the door. For example, on April 22, we came up with this set of suggestions if someone isn't being nice:

• Move away, run away, or leave
• Tell the person how it makes you feel
• Tell the person it's not ok to not be nice
• Make an angry face
• Use words. Ask the person if something is wrong, why they're not being nice, and how you can help them feel better.
• Don't have to be not nice back.

Regarding how we can keep loving each other even if we have an argument, here's the list we came up with on May 13:

• Be nice
• Say "sorry"
• Play a game
• Say "I love you"
• Give a kiss
• Be good
• Give a hug
• Be nice and love
• Read a book
• Share a toy

Prior to having kids (and especially after JD and AJ were born), my wife and I had family meetings of our own where we could discuss how things were going for each other and how we could support each other better. We still try to have those "adult-only meetings" once a week - usually while taking a walk - and it makes a big difference in our marriage.